I still don't know how to title (Yan)

I’ve realised that my uni life consists mostly of not actually going to uni.


Things that have happened since my last post:

  1. I’ve realised that I really like lists. They just feel less formal than paragraphs – or is that just me?
  2. I’ve been told in no uncertain terms that I should maybe stop talking about politics and stuff. Which means that this post will probably be boring. Sorry?
  3. Elections are over – thank god. The ticket I was with won some things. I’m going to be on a certain committee within the union next year. I feel like that’s as specific as I can get.
  4. I’m writing this in a cafe and it’s actually really cold so if the tone of this post is weird you can blame it on the weather.
  5. My roommate caught the flu. Subsequently, I also caught the flu. Ah, the perils of shared housing.
  6. I have so many lectures I need to catch up on and I’m internally panicking even as I’m writing this post. Procrastination at its best.
  7. Over the semester break I’m going on a trip that will involve transportation taken over roads, which will aim to eradicate the wealth gap between the global north and south. This is an initiative run by an organisation that has a club at Melbourne Uni, with a name synonymous to the tree that grows from an acorn.
  8. While everyone else was/is having midterms, I have nothing due until next month. What kind of witchcraft is this!?
  9. I’m probably having something published in the next issue of Farrago??????? I kind of don’t want to say anything in case I jinx it but this is just something that continues to amaze me.
  10. Prosh is happening, what, next week? To all those involved – I bid you good luck, and may we meet again on the other side of the battlefield. For those who aren’t – get ready for a very weird week.


That reminds me:

The other day I bore witness to a friend trying to explain Prosh to someone from another university. The reaction he got was: “That sounds terrible, I don’t understand Melbourne University.”

I’ve built up quite a collection of Prosh stories/rumours, most of which are either inappropriate to this forum or, well, perhapsnotexactlyquitelegal. But in case anyone’s still in the dark about what’s gonna go down next week, here’s a rough (possibly exaggerated/totally incorrect) idea:

Teams, ranging from 100+ members for faculty teams to small friendship groups, compete in challenges for points. Challenges in which teams compete include:

  1. Weird foods eating contest, including delicacies such as whole bottles of sauerkraut sauce (lol what is that). There may be brains? To be honest I’m expecting brains.
  2. The Long Drive, in which teams of five drive for 24 hours and complete challenges along the way. Past teams have purportedly driven all the way up to the ACT and across to SA.
  3. Giant construction challenges. Apparently one year some team (possibly engineering?) created like 3m tall giant instruments that actually worked? Somehow? I’m a bit vague on the details.
  4. Really really weird/innovative lecture bashes. Prepare for a week of not getting much work done.
  5. A nude Olympics that only occurs in the dead of night. To put everyone on an equal playing field, you’re only allowed to watch if you’re also naked. Isn’t that considerate?
  6. Naked wrestling? Not sure if this is part of (5) or just, y’know. More nudity.
  7. 24 hour scavenger hunt for over 700 items. A good portion of which will include nudity.
  8. Much nudity. Such wow.

Cut back to that friend from another university: “I’d understand if money was involved, but bragging rights doesn’t count as a prize. People actually do this for fun???”


Ah, next week is going to be exciting. And now I should really get back to getting my uni work for next week done early just in case I have no time next week (ha, I wish).

I’ll see y’all on the other side!

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