Check In Time! #3

1:36am, Singapore. I have just finished an assignment not too long ago, had a long chat and replied a long overdue email. I technically have 2 zoom calls scheduled for tomorrow late morning, and a couple over the weekend as well– ranging from interviews for school stuff, job related calls (will be starting a new job after all my assignments, but first some introductory calls? Does this word make sense? I’m sorry… my brain is really fried), as well as volunteer tuition stuff. And of course, the bulk of it all, other upcoming assignments due.

I’m going to be honest here and say I absolutely have no idea what to blog about. And out of so many times to blog, here I am, choosing to do it tonight after a hectic evening and at an hour where everyone else in my family is asleep. I guess the only reason I can justify to this is that I just felt like it.

It’s such a weird feeling. On one end I feel like everything’s manageable and it will all turn out just fine, but on another I feel as if I’m having a midlife crisis. It’s not just the assignments itself, but rather the whole aura and vibe surrounding this part of the semester that is worrying and suffocating. Especially so that it’s my first semester in university, which makes me really unsure of what to expect.

I guess the good part of all of this is that I’m trying to find joy in the smallest of things. Even a video of mayo farting on Tiktok cheers me up.

And no, I’m not going to say generic things like: “you got this!” “this will pass!” “try to keep a positive mindset but not worry about that H1!” Haha, idealistic, ain’t gonna happen. But here’s a wild thought: maybe when we are lying at home bored stiff during the holidays, maybe after university when all this madness is over and the new madness comes that is in the form of jobs… maybe, just maybe, we’ll miss this feeling. This worrying, suffocating vibe, that hundreds of freshmen face (and probably not just in Unimelb).

But till that day comes… enough said, better rush out my next essay.

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