Positive Emoticons. (Candy)
Life is coming up roses.
And you know what the most fascinating thing about it all is? Skimming over all the facets of my current existence, it doesn’t necessarily fall into the ‘perfect’ category. And yet way back when, when certain aspects WERE running smoothly, I always felt like something was missing.
It really does come down to acceptance, and shifting your perspective.
I’ve discovered the secret behind the failure of my previous approach to education; I feel fulfilled thrice weekly when I’m tutoring VCE students at my high-school; I’m in a relationship and actually allowing my complete self to be embraced by another, flaws and all; I’m not suffering from crippling social anxiety anymore… the list goes on.
And sure – sometimes the social anxiety does decide to rear its ugly head at the most inopportune of times. But the fact that I’m able to move past it, that I’m no longer solely defined by my awkwardness, that’s a pretty amazing feeling.
I didn’t really start contributing in my tutes until last Friday, in Cinema Studies. I spoke my mind, as soon as the thought presented itself – and instantly broke down the wall that was separating me from the tutor and my classmates. And again in Media and Society just this Thursday – I didn’t repress my thoughts. I didn’t always answer the questions correctly, but even accepting this is progress on my part – it’s okay to be wrong. The point is, you try and try and try, because you have nothing to lose to begin with.
I’m just rolling along, ready for whatever comes my way. I know I can handle it – and I know that there is enough room for me on this planet of 7 billion people. There is enough room for me and my own unique combination of talents, personality traits and quirks, and I’ve been proving this to myself pretty darn regularly this year.
So, in case you hadn’t gotten the general drift of this here Blog entry – Immaseriouslyhappygurl!
🙂
Only four weeks left until the winter break. WOW. With no exams to look forward to this semester, I am so excited about the idea of kicking back for eight straight weeks, nurturing my creative side… finally teaching myself guitar and putting that recently bought instrument to good bloody use… putting the money I would have spent on public transport and fast food toward something a tad more stable… and getting excited about the subjects I’ll be taking NEXT semester!
Off to be productive on this peaceful Sunday. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again:
Life is coming up roses.