Less optimistic by the second… (Katie)
I feel a bit like doing a slightly more in-depth look into one of my subjects for the Blog (because, be honest, you all care deeply about Criminology), but my energy levels are unpredictable and I may run out of steam.
I seem to always be doing something or remembering something I should be doing; not in the trendy ‘my amazing life is so amazing’ sense, more because I have to or I’ll regret it later. Tutes are important because [all those reasons they tell you], College sport is important because [all those other reasons], social life is important because without it I may just jump off my balcony and be crushed, not by gravity, but by all the things I have yet to do. Throw in chapel and appointments and sleep and food and family and…I’m just going to stop there.
The aforementioned appointment was quite interesting though. I am not looking to criticise the Disability Liaison Unit in any way – honestly, my liaison officer was very understanding and helpful. However! I came out feeling much worse than when I went in. I have quite specific and serve dyslexia (I’m totally okay with it, it’s just a part of life) and was looking to get some help with exams. During the consultation, however, I was asked to consider the affect this has on other areas of university: research, comprehension, note-taking, etc. To be honest, I tend to just do my best and clearly, as I managed to get into University, I did well enough. After taking about my ‘disability’ to such an extent, however…I look at the essays and reading I was planning to do this afternoon and think ‘am I capable of doing this? Is it too hard for me? Is my brain good enough?’. I’m not relishing the feeling. It’s made me feel…damaged (I guess), or faulty? Maybe I’ve just been in cruising along ignoring it for too long, but I definitely preferred cruising.
On a (slightly) more cheerful note! Research essays. Wow. I should have done History at school. I haven’t written an essay outside class since Year 9 and I think it’s showing. I hope my tutors are as good as everyone says, because I am going to need some help. (Quick help, though, because time is very much of the essence in my life right now).
That’s the meaty part out the way – I’ll save Graffiti to Terrorism: the Real Story for next time.
Happily, I have tickets for the Easter Thursday Footy, I am auditioning for a play with a dodgy German accent and there is someone kinda special for me. So that’s all good. The essays, however…
PS. What is with all the helicopters over Uni right now?
O_o Did you see Jackie or Martin at the DLU?
I’m hearing impaired myself so the DLU helps out with the LRC captioning. If I’m interpreting what you said correctly, I was in the same boat as you. I didn’t feel I really needed any extra assistance, because I’d always done well enough.
The trick to figuring this out is to realise that if you didn’t have [disability], you would’ve done a whole lot better than you are now. Ultimately the University wants you to be able to be at an equal footing with others as much as possible so that you’re not disadvantaged. It’s not like EVERYONE has dyslexia. Even if you have to make theoretical assumptions about how it’s affected your work, the reality of it is that no one can really accuse you of such because they can’t look through your eyes.
Give yourself a bit of time to think about it. You’ll be back and cruising right after 🙂
Thanks for the comment! I think sometimes I loose perceptive of the whole issue…I was diagnosed really late, so I’m used to getting along without help and being a bit embarrassed by what I perceive as a weakness.
Just got to be positive, I guess! I’m glad they’re helped you out too.