On stupid motivation, stupid twisties, stupid calculus.

Motivation is extremely low at the moment. Right now I’m sitting here mulling over a Calculus 1 assignment that is due on Monday, eating Twisties and browsing eBay. *pauses to eat Twisties.*  Look the thing is *eats twistie* that I am just *eats twistie* not in the mood. *scarfs down handful.* I don’t even like stupid twisties. But it’s the only form of comfort food in the house.

Finally, a lazy weekend where I can catch up on stuff. That’s what I thought. But after waking up late (finally had a sleep in, busy week…) what I thought would take me two hours tops to finish has got me stuck on one question.

The thing with Calculus 1. It’s a pain in the ass. All of my lectures run from 4:15 – 5:15 every Monday Wednesday and Friday. If I have a practical that day it means I’ll be in lectures/pracs for 6 hours straight. Add the time it takes for me to get to/from Uni and calculus one is a form of slow death. It’s not that it hard – if I did, I’d be more inclined to show up. But I don’t find it hard. I walk into the tutorials and kinda go, “oh yeah, I remember that from spesh last year” (calc 1 is basically spesh all over again – you have to get 29 or under in Specialist Maths to get in, any over and you do calc 2) and take a stab at the questions, with good results. But *twistie pause* I haven’t been attending the lectures for the last 2 weeks. I’ve been headachey and sick and getting home before 5 has been high on my priorities. So this assignment (there’s one every week) has shocked me. It’s hard. I can’t remember this stuff. What’s more, I can’t find anything on it in the textbook. And only very basic examples in google.

Calculus 1 *twistie break* does not record lectures. We have this book right, it has formulas, but we have to attend the lectures to write down the examples. *twisties flying everywhere.* I HAVE NO IDEA ABOUT THIS STUPID QUESTION I DON’T HAVE ANY FRIENDS IN CALCULUS I COULD ASK FOR THE ANSWERS FROM I CAN’T FIND A TUTOR TO HELP ME BECAUSE IT IS DUE FIRST THING ON MONDAY. *swearing is muffled by twisties.*

Oh yeah. Apparently Maths of some kind is recommended for the Dental Course *handful of twisties*I want to get into. Mind you, I only know of it being recommended and there seems to be no definite answer to be found all over the uni site. So I’m thinking I’ll give up on calculus next semester…  *throws twisties into mouth, fails, twisties everywhere.* Truth be told, I like Maths. And I’m not awful at it. But compared to my other subjects it’s not even a little bit satisfying. I think I’ll do Australian Flora and Fauna next semester… Or whatever that subject is. It looks to be a bludge. I need more bludge in my life.

Sigh. So aside from stupid calculus, I’m also rather stressed about exams. Not to the point of caring enough to actually study, but enough to feel sorry for myself. *twisties!* Maybe I’ll go to an Asian food store and be happy on Monday. I’ll try those neat looking Korean chips!  And finally try some Mochi!

Ughhhhh. Too many twisties.