The Official Week! (Kiryll)

How was everyone’s first week? I spoke to a few friends and they have all really liked the start of uni. The official start, the lectures and tutorials, the LMS lecture slides and Echo recordings. I am sure all of us are loving the social uni aspect: there have been thousands of BBQs and even free coffees/teas/low-fat-slim-milk-unalloyed-nonabusive short black coffees! One friend even reported scavenging 5 beers from a club event! That beerilliant for him stat reminded me of another stat – Melbourne Uni (South Lawn in particular) is a licensed venue. There you go: one difference between high school and uni – one place is a Coles Specials candy land for those who passed a SAC, the other an ethanol drenched lawn for anybody who cared to join a club/society.

But back to uni uni, or just uni for those who love this place for the friends and evenings in Carlton. How was your first lecture? Let’s do an interview!

(Student walks in to Union House with a plastic cup from Kere Kere, sits down, takes off his satchel and lets out an exhausted sigh).

I: How was your lecture?
S: Crammed, very crammed. I instantly mental-noted my-self to get to lectures 15-20 minutes early to ensure I don’t get there late.
I:Is getting to class late a problem?
S: Yes. There is usually the necessary but blood freezing few seconds where I have to stop at the entrance, look up at all those faces and search for a seat. That seat is usually somewhere in the middle of a row, which means people must twist their knees sideways to let me through. I feel annoying to be the reason why they hustle.
I: What about the lecture it-self?
S: It’s great! Funny, reassuring, but nevertheless scary. Mention of assignments in Week 3 does that to you. My friend even had a maths lecture which had no “administrative talk” buffer – straight into “accelerated maths”! He said that after 4 months of neuron paralysis, it was a formidable task. But it was such a different beast, the lecture. The lecturer is there for you to know everything you need, but they aren’t really there, too. I mean, you can come in late and not get the usual “Where is your late pass?”. You can fall asleep on the desk and either be the butt of a hawk-eyed lecturer’s joke, or sleep through unnoticed. You can even leave early and nothing would be made of it. It’s like a virtual game where you’re in control.
I: Tell us about the tutes?
S: I had a few but not all this week. The real deal starts on Monday! But the tute that I did have, it wasn’t the hushed Silence-Which-Cannot-Be-Broken type. There are reported cases of 50 minutes spent listening to crickets and ravellers outside. Only a window sneaks a glimpse of Hope! My tutorial was great. People are quiet at the start, but you just have to be a bit vulnerable, a bit you, and initiate a convo like you would with old friends.
I: Oh yeah?
S: Hmm! It eases the tension and people feel comfortable enough to be them-selves if you are being YOUR-self.
I: A word on locations and getting around?
S: Lost On Campus App, Lost on Campus App! Even though sometimes it tells me I am lodged in a building when I am 20 metres outside, it lets me know where all the lecture theatres, buildings and rooms are! Indispensable! Plus it has all the food spots and even a title called “Secret Spots”! They are not so secret now. After a few days I even sort of knew where to go without bashing into polls while looking at the app. And that feels bloody good. A true universitalite.
I: Any updates on books?
S: Yes, I am doing the classic Talk But No Walk.
I: Elaborate?
S: For example, it’s when I go on Youtube and justify it by saying I have the LMS page open, or when I make an appointment to a workshop on time-management but fail to attend because I’m too busy watching Youtube videos! Same with my textbooks. Especially since they are recommended but not required: less urgency and guilt to get proactive with it. But I will, I will. It’s only the Psychology textbooks that demand the wallet to lose considerable weight. Plus to compensate, I have half of Baillieu Library stuffed in my room and I continue with the Talk but no Walk.
I: Elaborate?
S: There are 1000 pages per book, 1000 books in my room…
I read 3 pages overall. Return the library back to the library and incur a huge fine.
The fine in total would have been enough to pay my ORIGINAL textbooks in the first place!
And that’s the classic Talk but no Walk.


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