Wow. These past couple of days (actually weeks) have been like an emotional roller coaster for me. Living by myself finally lost it's newness and appeal and things all went wrong. I got really lonely and miserable and I've let myself get behind with my work and all sorts of random little things which need doing.
My mum obviously realised I wasn't myself and we talked about everything and decided I should think about moving into college. Part of me does living by myself and I'm good at being independent but I'm just too isolated and I get lonely quickly. So it was a tearful Natty who turned up at the Trinity college (I was offered a place there last year and turned it down) reception today to talk to the advisers there about my options. I'd told myself the whole way there 'I won't cry, I won't cry' and then of course I got there, felt overwhelmed and got all pathetic.
Still, the happy ending to the story is that the lovely people there were very very supportive and explained what I could do about moving to Trinity next term. I feel really relieved and I think the sense of community there will be what I need. I will miss my little apartment and cooking for myself but being so alone has meant that my work has suffered and I'm not very happy so college is defo the right move :) So now I just need to take control of what has gone wrong and try and get my work back on track.
I have learnt a big lesson about asking for help BEFORE things get overwhelming. I'm so used to just being smiley and having a 'there's nothing I can't manage' attitude that I'm not very good at saying when things aren't ok. I guess stuff seems scary when you don't want to admit to yourself that you aren't managing 100% but I was amazed at how lovely and kind everyone was once I actually did ask for help.
I am so relieved!! I know I've already said that a couple of times but I AM SO RELIEVED. My message to everyone, even though I know people say it all the time, is DON'T BE AFRAID TO ASK FOR HELP!!
Haha, that's enough from me now. I've got just 4 weeks of term left, exams and then I'm seeing my family and THEN (fingers crossed) I'm moving. I can totally do that. I'm just going to work really hard and hopefully my grades won't have gone to far off track.
If anyone else is struggling, talk someone! Or talk to me and we can talk to someone together :)
Love Natty x x
Do you wanna know why there isn't someone writing in their blogs? It's called assessment times. Funny, funny indeed.
Sorry for my absence, but I'll get back to you ASAP. I just came back from break and realised how many assignments are due (and yes I didn't touch my books over Easter, in my country we call it A BREAK for a reason!)
Uuu!! How do write that out anyway, the sound of disgust... hue? So, it's "dhue!" Sorry folks, linguistics does that to ya =)
Hey everyone, wassup?
It's already been 3 whole days of uni and I've already been licked up like Wizz Fizz back to university life. For example, on Monday I had a mid semester exam followed by a movie night at a friend's place in Medley college (to save on metcards), woke up (Tuesday) missed the one lecture of the day by ...... 30 minutes to only remember that I had to wait around for my little sister to finish school by 3, get home, realise that there's a Farrago free film on, rush down to Nova, arrive early by an hour and a half (to make up for the previous lateness), watch the film, to finally get home around 11 to snooze around till today. Actually looking back on all of it it seems a bit haphazard, but not crazily different or extreme. No that would have to be my holidays.
I managed to smash up a piano, in formal ware, with hitting things. That was an interesting day, followed by events of increasingly stranger mangnitudes. But I digress, uniblog=uniblog, besides something that spectacular needs to be kept mythic, to keep the story going.
Anyway. . . things so far have been good at uni. Everythings more or less fizzled down to knowing what you yourself are capable of and becoming comfortable with your surroundings. I mean before the holidays everything seemed slightly unreal, as though O-week was still happening and you were still a new guy/gal. Now; however things seem to be more concrete, you know people in your class, you know you can miss out on lectures, you know how much buying lunch is costing you and you know who your friends are. Not just your old skool (quite literally) friends, but your new uni buddies as well.
It's funny that, up until this week I hadn't actually done any sort of 'going out' with people in my classes, it's strange and also harder to organise things within tutes. Probably because most people have to go to another tutorial and no, group work doesn't count. This 'going out' is more of a collective trust that's developed since the start of term until it's pestered someone enough to actually say, "Let's get to know each other better," (add "Laddddies" to the end of that to make it 100% fail worthy, in fact add that word to the end of any sentence to turn it into something sleazy enough to cook burgers off). So I think 6 (or meby 7) weeks is probably when most tute, groups will be absolutely comfortable with going out with each other. Also by the 6th week you should of memorized each others names. (Don't ask me to recite the names of people in my Homer to Hollywood tutes, I know nothing.)
Hey, I'm merely pointing out that groups, not individual friends or aquaintances are much harder to have cohesion with and take more time to develope. Not that I haven't "gone out," bah! I do that all the time. And no I am not being overtly sensitive.
Speaking of Homer to Hollywood (in the previous paragraph, which I have now edited to be two paragraphs behind this), today was interesting, work wise. We had THE LECTURE PERSON (who I know has a doctrate but can't remember her name, once again) FOR HOMER TO HOLLYWOOD TEACHING US. And did it make a difference, I mean everyone said something, we moved through topic's like they were tissues for a cold, we referenced the enlightenment, and compared to other novels. It was all so intense and different from our usual laid back tutorial. Not that either of them are bad, just that I prefered her difference in teaching. Now how do we broach that to anyone in the admin department without it looking like a criticism of a tutor's teaching style? Here I could just of course being a huge snob, but I really like having classes like the one I had today. I really need suggestions guys, otherwise this'll fester like somesort of balloon, then it'll explode with a bunch of confetti resulting in me getting everyone covered with metaphoric trash.
Humph. I just had Deja vu sept it was the type which tells me I should be writing about something else. As in I had the same setting, time and everything in the Deja Vu moment except that I was writing about something else. Something like Farrago. Which was...... "Boy are they hard to write in comparison to blogs?" "All my possible articles seem too depressing in contrast to Farrago to post?" "I like Farrago?"
Oh well can't be too important, if I'm letting it go within three lines. * Shrug*
Oh also I've forgotten my password for this website, lucky my web browser remembers it. Just goes to show I should really type it in more. That is if I remember it.
Enjoy the second half of the term!
Dan/Yoddeuss
Thank Christ for the non-examination period. I mean, literally, because it was Easter and everything, but also figuratively, because we are now a quarter of the way through the year. Bangin'.
During this initial incubatory six-week period, the recurrent theme of How are you finding Uni? has been a favourite amongst my family and friends alike (particularly with my grandfather, who has Alzheimer's, and inadvertently repeats questions up to four times in a twenty-minute phone conversation.)
Of course, my answer varies depending on the audience, but to summarise---I nod effusively like one of those bobble-head Jesus dolls and respond with something deeply intellectual like, "Yeah, really great, I love it." Which is, on the whole, true. "I love it" inasmuch as I enjoy my subjects, my tutors are swell, and nobody's mentioned ENTER scores in at least three months.
That said, I dug the mid-semester break like Kerouac dug girls, jazz and bennies in his great American novel. And so, in true back-to-school spirit, I present a journal of What I Did On The Holidays.
1. Had a rollicking game of 'Guess Who?'* Sometimes the best nights are the ones where you start off watching Mythbusters, move on to board games, and end up performing acrobatics to Peaches.
See, this is how you know it's going to be a good party: In the afternoon Scarlett and I went down to the grocery store, where our dear friend Sven was working, and conveniently offered us a two-for-one deal on champagne. Bonanza. Chatted with Sven for awhile; admired his hair, which is always sculpted into this incredible Wham!-esque perfection. (Seriously. Even when we all went to Pyramid Rock and slept in tents for four days, his hair was still Wham!'d. Superlative.)
Sven (gesturing to champagne): Is this all?
(Scarlett and I briefly calculate all the ridiculous things we could ask for.)
Me: No, we want ping-pong balls as well.
Sven: Ping-pong balls?
Scarlett (utterly deadpan): Yeah, we're going to Thailand and we want to practice.
Sven: Well, then go and grab some.
Me: But they cost $3.20.
Sven (sighing; hair wilting): Just go and grab them.
And just like that, we got free ping-pong balls! Of course, we had no real need for them, but you know, it's the thought that counts.
And that's how you know it's going to be kicker of a party.
2. Got a haircut. Not just a trim, either; we're talking, oh, maybe eight inches of hair being sawn off. While I have been wanting to get my hair cut for months now, and am pleased with the result, I was somewhat anxious in anticipation of this extreme lock-lopping. Mainly I was worried about looking like Taylor Hanson circa 1997.
Short hair is risky for girls; it can potentially suggest you're bi-curious or whatever. Not that there's anything wrong with being bi-curious. But I was thinking more Hayley-from-the-Jezebels-meets-Amélie than Tegan Quin. Although I don't want to undermine the arse-kicking ability of Tegan and her sideways mullet .
The bottom line is, my mother was not helpful as I drove off to the hairdresser. She thought it would be funny to wave me off by warbling 'The Sound of White' by Missy Higgins, a reference to the question mark over said songstress' sexuality. (Meanwhile at dinner that night, my eight-year-old sister Grace appraised my hair. Subsequently opined "Nope, you don't look like a lesbian." Yes, this would be my family.)
3. Slaved over my Democracy assignment. The Christian community may have reposed on Good Friday, but I got jiggy with the late great Senator McCarthy. Not literally, obviously; he is dead, and even if he were alive, I would not voluntarily spend time with the man. I doubt I would relinquish the time it would take to watch an episode of Iron Chef, for instance, or run up and down my stairs repeatedly, in order to have a heart-to-heart with the ugly man who spawned an ism. May he rest in peace.
Back to school tomorrow. I'm sure my 9 a.m. psych tute will be exhilarating, but that summer-is-ending hangover is still lingering.
* Sample questions included 'Does yours look like a paedophile?', 'Does she have a cleft chin?', and, 'I know you said it's a she, but would yours appear to be a transsexual?' (Susan, in case you wondered. There's some real ambiguity there. Check it out.)
I MADE IT!
Eight days in rural Victoria = A trip of a lifetime.
Highly recommended to any international student. It's a great way to get to know the “real” Australia. Go camping and visit your friends in their 'natural habitat', for nature it is...
I have to admit, it was hard. No Facebook, no Youtube, no Skype. Top that with a NO RECEPTION – EMERGENCY CALLS ONLY!
The lesson learnt here is to get Telstra or Optus, if you want to be on the safe side. If you dare to be more adventurous (and let's be honest, it's only for a week) take the chance to step out of the IT bubble, and enjoy the wonders of a world without technology.
After a few expected days of technology deprivation, my body slowly began to love the countryside and all it had to offer. We watched the Milky Way and a stunningly beautiful night-sky; we played boardgames and listened to the silence (some would call this nothing). To many this may seem boring. I wouldn't agree. My point is that we made time for each other. We talked and goofed around, and for once there was nothing interrupting us. Apart from the animals in the bush...
This is what I saw:
- Wild kangaroos (way cooler than the zoo!)
- A fox (sly and hungry, never a good combination)
- Red Back (BEWARE: DANGEROUS!)
- Birds with funny noises (they will wake you up in the morning!)
- This small lizzard (BEWARE: DON'T CRUSH, VERY FAST!)
and worst of them all:
They were everywhere: aggressive creatures with a tendency to end in one's mouth or ears, they are not something to play with. A friend of mine got so annoyed he screamed:
“I'll kill your grandchild!”
Note: reports are unsure whether the fly was listening, or if he was even remotely terrified by this threat.
I am aware this blog post may sound like your nearest tourist information. Don't get me wrong, the countryside was wonderful, but I wouldn't be able to stay there. Firstly, see above. Secondly, everyone knows everyone – from day one, everyone knew who we were. Finally, as far as I'm concerned, there's no work for me at Cohuna Farmers' Weekly...
Many thanks to the locals and the family I stayed at. You made my trip memorable!
Now it's back to getting interrupted again.
Say hello to Facebook! Say hello to Skype! Say hello to the world!
I've missed you.
/Olle 2.0
It'snd of the Easter holidays (nearly) and I cannot wait to get the term started again! Sorry to anyone who's feeling fed up about having to go back to lectures and stuff... I've had a good holiday but living on your own gets BORING when you haven't got a structured day to keep you occupied. Even if you go out in the evenings that's still about 14 hours of the day with not all that much to do. So yeah, I'm excited about Monday :)
I've learnt this Easter how important your own culture is to you. Australian culture is really similar to English culture but there are little things which I notice here and there which make my culture alarm go off. Typically now that I've actually sat down to write this post I can't remember the example I was going to give. Never mind. There are lots of things about Australian culture which I like a lot better than the English equivalent but equally there are a few things which are going to take some getting used to. Our culture is SO ingrained in our personality as well. For example (and this is isn't the example I wanted before lol) I was with a friend the other day and don't ask me why, but for some reason I started reciting the 'persil small and mighty' advert. It goes like this:
Little girl with crazy weird English farmers accent: "becoz perrrsil small an migh'y is concentrateeed it takess haaaalf the lorries te deliverr it, haaaalf the recyclin an uses haaalf as much wa-ter. Perrrsil small and migh'y, becoz evry child has the righ' to a brigh'er futurrrre."
or something like that... It's hard to convey the accent, if anyone would like a demonstration in person.... lol. But yeah, back to the point. She just looked at me, understandably, like I was the most insane person on this side of the southern hemisphere. It was weird because it's a big in joke with my friends at home and anyone would pick up on the reference straight away but here it's totally alien. Which is cool but really threw me for a minute.
So there we go, my Easter learning comes down to realising the differences in washing detergent advertising strategies. Oh and how to operate a treadmill - I have been a total gym fanatic the past couple of days!
Hope everyone else enjoyed their break! See you all soon :)
Love Natty
our freedom is slowly dwindling, gosh i hate the idea of going back for the rest of the semester. Its times like these i wish i was still in high school - that way we had fourteen days off instead of a measly seven :|.
Don't get me wrong i want to go back to uni, heck i even kinda look forward to uni during the week - i feel lazy if i'm not doing anything productive, which is why i probably hate the idea that i've wasted my holidays. You see, all i did was work (Joy) Easter Sat, Sun and Mon, do jack shiet tues-thursday, go to Eve, work and now i'm hear on a Saturday afternoon wondering where all my hours have gone, while trying not to glance at the growing stack of textbooks and readers that need reading/notes made out of. Ewwww.
What did any of you lovelies get up to over the *very short* Easter Break? Overseas? Camping? Interstate? Work? Party? am i getting close?
Cheerio.
Nik.
I am sitting in the National Library of Australia and am I little worried that I’ll get in trouble for typing too loudly. This place is intimidating.
On a more Victorian note – I discovered two wonderful things about the university last week.
1. Subject Coordinators are actually quite awesome.
This is based only on my experience with one particular lecturer, but it is definitely true of him. I was pretty sick last week and was beginning to get quite scared, as I got progressively more ill for no obvious reason (see point 2). Anyway, all this was made a lot worse by the fact that I had two essays due the day before the break. Oh God, was my general thinking. I had started them, but they weren’t what you’d call in the final stages. In a seriously marathon effort, I got one done. But not the other. So, on Wednesday, I emailed my lecturer, hoping to get an extra day or two.
He gave me a week. Was incredibly understanding and helpfully. Saved me from overpowering anxiety! So now, as I sit here, doing my essay, I think fondly of him. I’d suggest if anyone else gets into a similar situation, you let your subject coordinator in. They want to help.
2. The Medical Service actually cares.
Okay, in an ideal world, I wouldn’t have to wait for an hour and forty minutes at the clinic to see a doctor while in serious discomfort. But obviously, I survived. Once I was seen the doctor was helpful and friendly. Sent me off to the hospital for some tests and made sure I saw him again the same day to discuss the results. I actually got the feeling he was genuinely concerned, rather than trying to rush me out the door. And when you’re stressed and anxious, that’s a nice feeling to have. Thanks to nice the health service, I am fully recovered and know where to go next time I am unwell!
That’s my two suggestions for anyone with problems. People are helpful. Isn’t that cool? :)
It's official. I'M OFF TO THE BUSH!
This is a joke, I've never really done bush-walking before (is that even what you call it?) All of a sudden I feel foreign.
I've only gone camping [sort of once] at the German Rock Festival Rock Am Ring, which doesn't even count, because I was sharing camp with two Polish scouts, and some additional 50,000 people. Bush-walking sounds VERY DIFFERENT.
If you'd know me you'd already be laughing by now.
For Christ sake (I might as well go with the theme):
I AM LAUGHING!
I can barely survive civilisation. I can cook basic food (Migi) and use an oven, a microwave and a stove. But in the bush..? Could very well be your next TV show right there:
So, You Think You're a Foreigner?
Scene I
Swedes (i.e. hot blondes from IKEA): Eye to eye with snake.
TV Host (i.e. heavy Aussie accent): Hunt it down and cook it!
Swedes: Start making crazy noises JAAA which appear to be screams, as they run away from the snake.
TV Host: It's made out of plastic... and bought from IKEA.
Come to think of it, no electricity would do too.
Am I being too judgmental here? Yes...
Surely, there aren't any weird people out there...
Damn WOLFCREEK!
It's a horror movie. Whatever you do, don't watch it. Unless you're into that kind of stuff (creepy guy hunting down backpackers). If you're easily paranoid (that would be me) and if it's the first time you're going camping in Australia, DON'T WATCH IT!
IT WILL FREAK YOU OUT!
With that said, Happy Easter!
Enjoy civilisation!
/O.
When we were first told of the rules of writing on the blog, one was that 'you can have a b***h/rant about anything that you want' (not directly quoting of course).
At first (as uni was going s'well) I thought, "What would I have to complain about?"
Now its like, "What isn't there to complain about?"
In all honesty, uni is great, loving the hours, but for some reason the work isn't getting as high marks as I would ideally hope for.
Oh well, if you're in the same boat getting maybe less than average for work that you're trying really hard in, shout out! Then the rest of those who don't shout out but are feeling really girly and emotional about it can feel a little better about themselves (me included. ha)
Take it on the chin, and move on, and do better eh?
Good News Week is quite funny, watched it on Channel Ten before.
ASH!
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